MISTAKEN IDENTITY, YOU MADE MY DAY

Hi Joe, I am Juan

Who's handsome? Definitely, I will be the first to say that I am. This Freudian self-worship may not actually be harmful; it even helps sometimes. If the confirmation, however, comes from others then I am doubly happy, it would resurrect my long dead grandfather from whom I have inherited my not-so-Pinoy looks. I have always been mistaken for someone I am not. In one of the high end restobars in Manila, someone congratulated me for winning a motocross event. I have never driven a motorbike, and someone mistook me for an extreme sports athlete. Cool! I have also been mistaken for a priest, not just once but several times. In one of the posh hotels in Cebu, I got past through the body scan and security check. The security personnel asked, "Father, are you attending the convention?" Yes, I said and I got in without the usual hassles of body frisking. To top, I have so many times been mistaken for a foreigner. It should have been the mixed of genetic grace. I am taller than the usual Juan. I got a patrician nose and I grow a lot of facial hair faster than my scalp. Children thought I am "Hi Joe". My former teacher thought I am one too. Just a while ago, coming from school, as I entered the house a fish vendor shouted, "Isda, Sir." I gestured No with my hands. She must not have seen it and thought I did not understand her at first. She shouted again, "Fish, Sir!" and that made my dreary Saturday all too sunny. I entered the house with a smile on my face.

CAMIGUIN...AN ISLAND BORNE OF FIRE

Summer Perks...Thanks to UbD

You were not in Camiguin until you had been to the White Island, actually a sand bar off Mambajao. We went there early to catch the sun, not to burn under it

In background is Mt. Hibok-hibok as seen from the "Island"

'Can't help but jump with joy

I did not miss to take a dip

My first side trip - Katibawasan Falls in Mambajao, Camiguin

Site of the Panaad, a cross-province Lenten observance

Purportedly this is an underwater graveyard, the Sunken Cemetery

16th Century Church Ruins at Guiob, Bonbon, Catarman

Soda Swimming Pool at Catarman, Camiguin

"Tres Marias" - a cluster of volcanoes in Catarman

Sto. Nino Cold Spring still in Catarman, Camiguin

At Fishpen, a restaurant by the lagoon in Mahinog, Camiguin

RSM Sisters tendered dinner for my last night in Camiguin

SUMMER PERKS...THANKS TO UBD

A Day inside Del Monte Philippines

The farm has a secondary hospital too.

Pineapple farms stretch as far as the eyes can see.

DMPI Clubhouse...feelin' rich

May golf course pa! Grabe, sarap doon tumira.Para 'kong si Tiger Woods

The bowling lanes...state of the art AMF

It also has a mini gym with complete amenities.

Conifers...yes, in Bukidnon

An eco-village resort...fascinating

Important persons allowed me to get closer to the DMPI packing facility

LOVE - HATE RELATIONSHIP...

In Boxing, I should have added

Last May 3, I stayed glued to the TV watching the Pacquiao-Hatton fight. Since it is also vacation time and I just stay home, I get to see some of the pre-fight TV specials. What I have listed below are some of the things I love and hate about the fight.

I love the Pacman. With all the successes Manny Pacquiao had, he remained a soft-spoken, simple guy who has not forgotten his humble start. It is this humble beginning that propelled him to work hard and better his craft. Today, he is so famous that he has even outpolled Obama in the Time’s 100 most influential people. Despite everything though, he remains unaffected and resolute to his faith, which to Manny has been the source of all the good things he is now enjoying.

I hate Floyd Mayweather Sr. and his bad mouth. I was able to see the 24/7 pre-fight boxing special and this Hatton trainer cannot seem to keep his mouth shut. Freddie Roach was correct when he said that Mayweather Sr. actually has not trained a champion yet. He took over de la Hoya when Oscar was already a champion in four weight divisions. He did not train Floyd Jr. to be the undefeated pound-for-pound boxer before the latter retired. It was his brother. Floyd Sr. was no show when Hatton was floored in the second round. If I were Ricky, I will fire him and hire the three-time trainer of the year, Freddie Roach.

I love Freddie Roach. He is not just a tactician in the sport of boxing. He understands Manny Pacquiao emotionally. He provided the People’s Champ with the love and care of a father who has long left Manny when he was still very young. He was responsible for transforming the puny 106 lb lad from Gen. Santos to the southpaw wonder boy of boxing today. Roach also took under his care a half-blind vagrant who he made into his all-around utility man in his Wild Card gym. Because of Parkinsonism that slowly drained him of his strength, he also took as his assistant trainer Michael Moorer to continue his boxing legacy.

I hate the commercialism that goes with the boxing TV coverage. I watched the fight in cable TV but not the pay-per-view. I would be contended even of late telecast since I have the Internet and my brother right away sent me an off-line message yesterday that Hatton was knocked down cold at 2:59 in the second round. I wanted to see how everything happened. About 360 seconds of boxing was stretched to almost four hours of advertisement and commercial agony. I was at first very much irritated by the commercials that suddenly cut in important boxing telecasts. I was not even able to see Tom Jones crooned the British national anthem. The only saving grace is a commercial of a roof sealant featuring a dumb girl with heavy dumbbells to her credit. Whoa!

I love the Filipino people all over the world. I was just so happy looking at how united we were as one group of proud Filipinos as Pacquiao fought his greatest fight so far. As Martin sang the Lupang Hinirang, I was as moved as he was standing tall for all the nations to see that we are a mighty race of people who know how to stand up when we fall and run the race again. Manny has made as prouder than ever. Pacman’s victory was the triumph of Filipinos all over the world. His very impressive win over Hatton was so inspirational. A Filipino after defeat will not just simply buckle down and wallow on his loss. He stands up, learns from his mistakes and wins the many battles in life.

Having said what I love and hate of the Pacman-Hitman east meets west boxing bout, I would like to congratulate both Manny and Ricky for the fun and excitement they have given the world of boxing...even if for 359 seconds only. With the tons of commercials that have made me memorize some, the tournament was worth all my waiting. Mabuhay ang Filipino!

WET SUMMER, DAMP WEATHER

Nature Fights Back - The Rain

When I was still a child, we lived in a two-storey Spanish inspired house. It had a long wooden staircase that ended up in the second floor landing which also served as a receiving room. It had cabinets full of books, which I do not know where now. The receiving area conveyed visitors to the main living room which was very spacious. It was in this room where I spent most of my childhood days whenever I was not allowed to go down and meet with friends. I remembered running and jumping in the room because its sheer size allowed even all us seven cousins there. This was the ancestral house and my cousins who lived nearby always visited me to play hide and seek upstairs. There were so many rooms with a lot of nooks and crannies that swallowed us up. The second floor was every young child’s enormous playroom. On one side of the living room were windows facing the road and the sea beyond. These were Spanish windows with panes made of capiz shells. I toyed with the panes because they could be slid to and fro. Whenever my Lola saw me doing this, she always got angry. The room and the windows were very memorable for me.

During the monsoon season, which is from June to September, it always rains so hard. Because we lived by the sea, the house got to be buffeted with too much wind, seawater and sand besides the rain. What I remembered vividly well was that whenever there was bad weather then, I just stayed inside the house and played with the rain by the window panes. The rain holds special fascination to me even until now. I always love the rain. When I went to school then and it rained so hard without me bringing any rain gear at all, I just pried a big banana leaf and used it to keep me from being wet. I enjoyed being in the rain to my mother’s utter displeasure. So whenever it rains today, it brings back fun childhood memories. I don’t live in a two-storey house anymore and my sea view is already blocked with a massive two-storey Dutch house. I do not miss the wind, the sand and the sea. Although I still miss the window panes, the rain is more than enough to compensate for my childhood longing of that certain pleasure only a child knows by heart.

It’s still April and it is still summer suppose to be; however, the rain has made its presence felt a lot earlier. Could this be the end of summer? I don’t care. I love the sun but I more than love the rain. Today, I can appreciate so much the rain not only because of the happy childhood memories that come rushing in my mind but more of its practical benefits to man and the environment. Because it is summer and it is too hot, the rain is definitely a welcome respite. Any late afternoon rain that continues until the wee hours of the morning brings a restful night sleep sans the air conditioning system. The Bermuda grass and other flowering plants cannot help but turn yellow to brown during summer. They get sun burned too. They need plenty of watering, but water during this time is a precious commodity. Watering plants is not wasting water. It is not just the priority however. My hometown earns the distinction of being the “Vegetable Basket” of the region. Ours is basically an agricultural community and this is how we earn our keep. Rain and lots of rain is what we need to sustain high value crop production. Thus, rain to me today goes more than just happy childhood memories.

What brought the rain, however, a lot earlier? The weather bureau said that it’s the convergence of different weather systems that made us wetter a month earlier. Experts also have been very vocal about erratic climate change and unpredictable weather changes to be due to global warming. Global warming in return is caused basically by how much we pollute the planet. I am not complaining about the rain. Its coming though is a lot earlier and this must make all of us rethink of how responsible we are for this phenomenon. Do we still have to wait until we drown in a deluge of rain to stop destroying nature and the environment? For sure I will not be thinking of fun childhood memories by that time when I am holding on to dear life because I am drowning in my own foolishness and everyone else’s. It's a hard time ahead.

ORAL INTERCOURSE WITH JP

Conversation with My Student

After we had the talk in Talisay, you changed and I was not quite prepared for the change. I knew before that something was not right, but after Talisay I thought you have retreated back instead of moving on. Have I put you in an embarrassing position? I hope I have not because that was not my intention. Were you sorely affected by what I told you, or did my note come in bad taste? I did both not to put you in a very compromising situation. I did both to help you. I am sorry but it was not my intention to further hurt you. After Talisay, you became more withdrawn. You became more to yourself which was very much unlike you. Have I made you sadder than before? I want to apologize because this is not what I intend to happen. I think there was something wrong with how I approached things and the situation. Maybe I came too strong and you felt both threatened and helpless.

If indeed my observations before Talisay were valid and you now want to change because you heard from me, do not ever think that mine was an imposition upon you. I never meant it to be that way. Do not drastically change yourself. You cannot do it overnight. You are today conducting yourself in a manner not quite normal for a guy your age. It is as if you have grown old suddenly. You’ve lost the fun in your life now. I don’t want it that way. I don't think we understand each other. I was not very clear to you. Do not think that we thought of you as somebody bad because you have done this or that. No! In fact you are still one of the best students I ever had!

How you have been acting lately was something new to us all. It seemed as if you were no longer the student I knew before. I appreciated your effort to shy away from alcohol and too much X-rated movies. Both will bring you nowhere. I salute and respect you on this aspect. It needs a lot of control, patience and sacrifice. I support you in this pursuit and I am very sorry now to have introduced you to Mia. I am sure though I have not introduced you to alcohol. Although I drink socially, I am not into killing myself with too much booze. It burns the liver. I find it funny, therefore, when you have the impression that I do consume alcohol a lot. No, I do not. It all depends on the crowd, as I have told you through the text message.

Have you been all in grand charade before? Maybe you are actually trying to be just the real you this time. Maybe you have not actually changed for the better because what you have been from first year to third year has been one big pretense - a sham. You did things before to please the people around you, your classmates maybe, just to be with the in crowd. If in fact this is what was before, then you are indeed a very cunning guy. You have fooled me into believing that you are one strong and cold bad boy. This speaks so much of how smart you are. Only a few people can pull successfully such a grand charade.

Do not ever think that I doubted your goodness. I have always believed that you were and still now a good person. I am choosy when it comes to people I associate with. I only go with smart, well-mannered and good-looking people. You are all three. You are more than intelligent in fact. You are to me, educated. You’ve got the manners and you look good too! You even dress better than I did when I was your age. All three things make you the "man". You are in the class of JR and CJ. Remember that you are one of the Men Entice and you will forever be remembered as one.

So then younger bro, cheer up and be happy. You have been so serious with life lately. I don't like the drastic change, although I appreciate your effort to change. It's just so sudden; I am not prepared for it. I'm sorry, but you come as fake to me because I have always known you as the JP that I knew before – hard, hot and always in heat.

LIQUID DREAMS AND WET MEMORIES

How Much I Have Forgotten the Sea

Being 38 has its toll on me. I felt tired and frustrated with work. I was so challenged this year with my work that I have even decided to resign and look for another. I know 38 is not that old yet, but I am roughly half way through life. Men's life expectancy is getting shorter that I think 70 is even an exaggeration. However, I am tired and frustrated with my work, because of my own fault. I cannot blame both to others. I have to modify some of my work behavior and relationship with peers and colleagues, even to my employers. When 2009 started, I promised to change. I worked on being "meaner" this time as the principal to both my teachers and my students. I also became more open with my thoughts, and sadly voiced them out as condescending opinions. I don't care. I was just tired of being the good boy, which I am not. Because I put on some weight last year, I also promise to lose some this year. It maybe a little late because I have just started this April after school closed. I'm on my first week of exercise and sensible eating. Today, I took a swim in the sea to cool down.

I live by the sea. It is just a stone's throw from the house. When I was still young and everything was pristinely beautiful, the sea was where I spend most of my day. At about 8 in the morning and whenever it was high tide, my friends and I were already in the water, paddling ourselves like hell. I learned how to swim earlier in life. Most of us did, so one could just imagine how much fun we had then. We always ate lunch in the sand and continued our beach frolic and swim until sun down. By 4 in the afternoon, we were all sun burned, not just tanned. Today I sport a sun kissed bronze skin, courtesy of my hay days at sea. Our beach fun did not just stop with swimming. Whenever there were fisherman's boats around, definitely the owner would have a hard time looking for his boat afterwards. I could row boat before and I can still do it equally as well today. These memories came rushing back to my mind as I spent an hour this morning at sea.

My purpose of swimming this morning was to cool down after exercise and help me with my sore muscles. It cannot be denied that sea water offers healing wonders too, not just fun. I do a lot of cooling down as I do warm ups whenever I exercise. I always feel less sore whenever I do both well. However, the cool sea water does more magic to my sore muscles. Today, I felt quite sore with my abdominals although I did only a few reps of sit ups yesterday. This is good news of course. Another good news is in my quads, trices, biceps and pecs. At least I am in for a good start. I think I have to do more reps for my delts. I did not feel any tightness there. My traps also were quite sore. I am happy with the way I am doing. I always believe in less pain, not the overkill. I do not bulk that much nor do I want to. I just would like to trim down and live healthy. This is why I seldom suffer too much muscle pain after working out. A nice, long dip in the sea usually cools me and relaxes my tight muscles. I could not, however, resist the temptation to do several lapses of freestyle swim this morning. The feeling was different. I just missed the sea. I haven't been to the beach for almost two years. I was so excited swimming, feeling so carefree and relaxed.

I also got to clear my mind whenever I am at the beach or in the sea swimming. When I still used to mountain bike before, I usually made the shore my last stop. If I did not decide to take a dip to cool myself, I just sat there, rest to catch my breath. While sitting, looking afar, I usually got a clearer view of everything that has happened so far in my life. I was able to reflect on the lapses I have failed to do and the good deeds I have done. It is also by the sea that I got to come up with the most rational decisions in life. There is just something with the calm of the waves and the breeze of the wind that soothes my mind. That same magic by the sea worked again to me this morning. Looking afar, not at the zenith, but the green mountains that hover over my place, I felt relieved of the days' problems. I felt an unexplained peace in my heart as I bobbed my head up and down the water line. I remembered some of the things I still have to do that have been bothering me for quite a time. I did not feel the pressure though. Instead, everything just fell in the right place and I got out of the water knowing what would be the next best thing to do to help me pass by the day.

It is downright shameful living by the sea and not able to enjoy it for almost two years. I am indeed embarrassed and I cannot feign work as an excuse. Now that I have refocused my life and have been trying to straighten out everything, I see the sea again. It was there, it is there and it will forever be there. Only that I refused to see it. I have forgotten the magic the sea brings to my life. I have been so engrossed with work and troubled with life lately, but if only I have run to the sea for some moments of peace, I would not have reached my wit's end. I forget that the sea can remind me of my happy childhood memories. It can vividly bring back to my mind long lost childhood friends who I no longer know where. The sea can bring physical healing. Whatever has pained me for a time would have been healed by the warm lapping waves of the sea against the body. My troubled mind would have been soothed by the hypnotic calm of sea ripples and gentle breeze. How foolish of me to have forgotten all these! Today is Earth Day. I think it was all the sea that beacons me back to him. I am reminded all today of the mysteries of life and how they unravel to us in as simple as the sea, and as mundane as the racing waves.

FIGMENT OF IMAGINATION, IMAGINATION OF BIG MEN

This One's To Heat Up Summer More

I just woke up from an hour sleep. I slept at around 3 o’clock this morning. I have been programming and boozing until the wee hours of the morning. Basically my life yesterday until this morning was sex, alcohol and pizza. I am not proud of what just took place but why am I telling you all this. I like you to realize that though I am your teacher, I am as culpable to sin just like anybody else. As what I have told you, I am not proud of what happened yesterday, but ain't no saint.

Only a few know me quite well as a person. Usually people know me by what I have done and what I have been doing. You are one of the former few people. And I consider you my close acquaintance. I hate to be known as a good teacher or a doctor or a leader. At least to you, I am an ordinary easy-go-lucky guy. Rest assured though that I am more than a good friend to all my friends. I am never afraid to show my weaknesses nor do I ever display them. I work on my assets and potentials and these I turn into personal excellences.

This is the lesson I want you to learn. You got the potentials to make it good in life later on – brains, looks and manners. You work on these potentials and turn them into your own personal excellences. Be the smartest brain that you can be and the finest looking, well-mannered gentleman you can. Be true to who you are. Do not be embarrassed by your human weaknesses. Do not hide them but do not flaunt them too. Be yourself. Do not try to appear what you really are not; otherwise you will be found much wanting to be who you are not – a fake. You can be good and still be human. I am not forcing the issue of you behaving like the next candidate for sainthood. It’s not just you.

What we have been up to for the last few months, I hope you will not mistake as my pushing you into it. I am treating you as a young man now, endowed fully with the capacities to decide for your own good. If you think there is nothing wrong about programming then there is nothing wrong about it but if you feel it is wrong, then it is wrong. I believe that as long as nothing gets hurt, the action is neither good nor bad. The morality of my action and its intrinsic worth depends on my purpose of doing it. This may not be correct because the end does not always justify the means. But who cares!

Now that you’ve seen one of my human weaknesses, I hope nothing changes. I have never said that I am perfect. No! I am not. So are you but do not try to change and make yourself appear so innocent to me. I understand your needs and I don’t care about them as long as you’ll hurt nobody and this includes yourself. You are smart. You know what you are doing. I look forward to a much better barkadahan next year.

(Read beyond the lines. This is not meant like how it sounds.)

TO CANLAWILAO...AGAIN AND WITH LOVE

Great Expectation and Summer Anticipation

Definitely, it's summer already. After I've taken my shower and prepared for my class in the local college, I was drenched with sweat, I had to put the air conditioning system into full blast. I just can't help but feel so uncomfortable even early in the morning. To say the sun has really made its hot presence is an understatement. It burns. Burn, baby, burn! As I was traveling for school today, my skin tingled as the sun hit me. The warmth though becomes ordinary as the days of summer unfold. It may even be so addictive, that before I purposely basked under the summer sun mountain biking to my heart's content.

I will have my early summer retreat though. I am planning of spending my last two days of March in a log cabin in the mountains. This summer vacation house is owned by my sister's friend. It is located roughly 15 km from the town center, way up the mountains. My town is the summer capital of the province, so I expect that the weather up there definitely is a lot cooler than the rest. It is a log cabin nestled amidst tall pines and year-old tree ferns. It is rustic with an air of country mystic. One part of the house is made of glass panelling overlooking tall evergreens providing shade to lambs. The place always blows me away. This will be my third back there, rest as if the world stops spinning frozen with time.

The first time I was there, I marveled so much in the cabin's external architecture. Everything is made of either log or wood. With much creative expertise, a lattice made of both decorates the front wall of the house, welcoming every tired sojourner. The front garden teems with exotic flowers that bloom only in temperatures less than 10 degrees Celsius. There are anthuriums of so many colors for one's eyes to feast on. Inside the cabin is as quaint as its exterior - log benches in a dining table, couches with soft feathery covers and the stone fire place. Temperatures at dusk usually fall below 5 degrees that the warmth glow of burning fire helps. The place is really worth coming back for more.

The anticipation of going back is killing me, so to say. I just do not know what to expect after almost three years. There can be so many changes done on the cabin, but I hope everything is for good. I expect to see again the collection of dead branches. I hope the millionaire's bushes are in bloom. The sprigs carrying blue blooms are what I like best. I will also be very happy if the friendly German shepherds and Rottweilers will still be wagging their tails for me. I love dogs. They are friends I can always rely on. The hammock hanging between two tree ferns, I hope will still be there. The gazebo, the secret pathway at the back, the looming pines by the kitchen, the uniformly bottled spices neatly arranged in the cupboard...so many things, not to mention the friendly ghost that keep watch the house from occasional teenagers looking for adventure.

I have noticed lately that I have not been so angry anymore. I may have been tired of looking so childishly foolish. Well, this is good. However, I am now more inclined to think that I am a lot happier because of these great expectations - a summer retreat in a log cabin nestled in the valley of pines with so many things inside and outside that can overwhelm my senses. I am tired and the idea of a blissful rest away from the nightmares of modern civilization even for a couple of days sounds so appealing. It has mellowed me down. I am the angry teacher no more. How stupid I was before not being able to think that an angry teacher's antidote is plain and simple thought of a great expectation - a sense of focus of where life may lead. Dwelling on what has been simply causes much more pain...and the vicious cycle of anger starts again.

THE RAPE OF FARCE

Lance Corporal Daniel Smith

When the news broke that a teenage girl was gang raped by US servicemen that befriended her in a bar, I told myself, "Well it was her fault." If ever there was no sign of violence and that she willingly rode with them inside a van where she was purportedly raped, then it was her fault. Why in the world would she go out with these obviously burly men she just met in a bar? Any girl trying hard to be a lady will not ever dare engage in deeper conversation with men she has just met, much more ride with them in the middle of the night inside a close van. Nicole, as she has fondly been known ever since, is definitely not a lady.

Lance Corporal Daniel Smith was convicted of raping Nicole more than a year ago. For few hours of giving in to his baser instincts, he was made to realize the foolishness of his decision only when inside the cold city jail. There was so much outrage afterwards. Women's group claimed triumphant. Some government officials viewed everything a threat to the VFA. I pitied Smith because he himself was a victim too tried in a country whose judicial system is as rotten as her leaders. I pitied Nicole because she herself became prey of her own foolishness and the anger of marginalized groups promoting the cause of women.

Just two days ago, however, Nicole recanted everything about the alleged rape. Through a letter she asked her mother to give to her lawyer, she wrote that she was tired of how slow the case was moving and that she no longer was sure if she was indeed raped or was it her own undoing of flirting with the men that led to her being gang raped. Our memory indeed is so bad that after a year or so, we can no longer remember how savagely degrading we were raped or how blissfully satisfying was it climaxing with four or so sex-crazed US servicemen. How quaintly foolish a statement this is. From the very start, I knew it was Nicole who was guilty and not those sex hungry burly young men out of sea for just few hours of fun.

For these turn of events, a lot speculated that Nicole was bribed. She allegedly has received a sizable amount of money bigger than any slut's boobs and, surprise of all surprises, she is now in the land of spunk and honey, in the land of men who made her their spigots' end. What a crazy unfolding of plot this has become. What a sad twist of fate for the women's group. What a welcome news to Daniel Smith's throng of crazy fans. What a blow to our already rotten judicial system. What a farce! The joke of all comedies, making our courts look like small-time moro-moro stages.

If Nicole was really true to the cause she had been fighting ever since, she should not have done this comedy of errors. If she was indeed gang raped, no amount of money could ever dissuade her out of the case. If she was indeed violated, however slow her case was moving on could not have caused her to recant what she told the court then under oath. If everything she said was true, and that she was indeed gang raped, then her action definitely was sending a very wrong message about women in general. I was never all praises to her when this hullabaloo started. Deep within I knew something was out of picture, not in sync with the whole song Nicole was singing.

A lesson or two may be learned from this comedy. A young girl's mind that sets in between a slutty pair of ears is changeable, and unfortunately holds only a few memory cells. She may be gang raped but for a few dollars more, she will forget everything and confuses rape with mere child frolic. Her cerebral folds are almost indistinct with apparently just a smear of gray matter. Another very important lesson to bear in mind is that when a man's brain is allowed to sit in between his legs, expect for a catastrophic foreplay that will have its climax inside a stone cold jail. This case may not go down in the annals of our rotten judicial system. Definitely though, this is no equal to even Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.

MIA, TU ERES ME AMOR

What Keeps Me Going Despite a Bad Day

I got lost today in a mountain of all-so-unexpected tasks, and I was so overwhelmed. It got through my nerves thinking that as early as 7a.m. I was drowned in a senseless conundrum brought about by inefficient, apathetic zombies haunting our ineffective work place. As I got hold of my daily time record, I got a sweet, bloody note attached to the (Ted) Bundy clock. But not as sweet as the way it was handed to me was the message that was all too shockingly unintelligible. I was to send a fax message to a person I knew informing her of something I do not know what. My goodness! How would I send a facsimile of something that I do not know, much more, I do not have? Interesting hypothesis for an action research!

As I was figuring out how I could manage to have our substitution program working - one pregnant teacher was due to deliver any time soon, another one was absent, three were out for an educational tour - an old teacher friend of mine arrived. He lost a gold necklace which was owned by his mother-in-law. You can just imagine how monstrous his monster-in-law had morphed. Purportedly, a bystander saw that it was one of our freshmen students who had found it around the hospital vicinity. I asked which of our young students. Nobody can describe how the student looked like because it is indeed very hard to describe somebody you have not seen. Well, a good topic for a scientific research.

After I supposed to have a class with the junior students differentiating a while...do from a repeat...until loop, I soon discovered that I was actually talking like a moron within a company of idiots (except for some beautiful ladies). I ended up an imbecile ambling myself back to the faculty room where I temporarily cramped for the day. I went through some of the senior test papers on web page designing and literally came out more confused than my students. How in the world can 16-year old brains fail to understand that anything inside the title tags will be found only in the title bar and not within the web page? And I have been talking about this for eight months now!

As I was getting through my day with much difficulty, confusion and frustration, our secretary told me that the public grade school principal has called up. I feared for the worst. As I was making myself extra-friendly with her secretary, lo and behold, the principal appeared by my side! Our Grade VI pupils are to be included in the National Achievement Test (NAT) which will be two days from now. No problem because I believe our Grade VI pupils can hurdle anything more than our HS seniors, but who will retrieve the test questions and the answer sheets? Who will administer the test? We were called by the DepEd for a briefing but for the sophomore NAT, not the Grade VI NAT? Cannot the DepEd be less nutty? Makainat ug pasensiya!

Then as my day was to end, our school treasurer came in and told me that the seniors' parents' recollection will be on March 8, a Sunday from 7-9p.m. Post meridian? It just cannot be. We have parents from as far as the tenth kingdom and they just cannot make it more than they do not want to make it. They still have to ride flying dragons and fight their way across raging battles between staying home to watch Goin' Bulilit or listening to a balding, holier-than-thou priest proselytizing the beauty of natural birth control method over no sex control method at all. Interesting indeed! I would rather listen to the balding priest than to those noisy devil-may-care kids trying hard to look like insane adults.

To cap my day, in college where I moonlight, some of my students complained why they passed the Midterms. I was dumbfounded, I cannot think of an answer though I was expecting the question. Others, though, were so disappointed why they failed. But please do not ask me, although I was also expecting for the question. This is my typical day. Aren't you jealous of how more unpredictable it is than PAG-ASA? Or, aren't you jealous of how more confusing it is than the stock market? Better, aren't you jealous that I am slowly and softly killing myself without your song? How melodramatic! Only Mia, my girl, makes me happy. Aren't you jealous I have her?

ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK...

Summer Frolicking and Working

Summer has officially started. It’s March and it’s already too hot. Roughly, there are three more weeks to go before the school year ends and I can take my much needed rest. I have nothing planned out for summer vacation – maybe just stay at home and frolic by the beach. I have practically the whole beach being just a stone’s throw from home. When I was young, we usually spend the whole afternoon by the shore playing whatever we can think of and get hold on to. Maybe this summer I will do the same. I miss the beach so much now. It was quite a while since I last visited the beach.

I have some speaking engagements too this summer. This is the other thing I look forward to during summer. I am often invited by schools to give pre-service seminars and workshops on current trends in basic education to both their old and new teachers alike. Besides the pay being so handsome, I also love the pampering afforded to me every time I visit schools. I am always housed in a nice place – mostly hotels and resorts. I am usually provided wide selection of food to choose from. This is a very nice way to end my summer vacation.

Definitely, I am looking forward to this summer. I don’t know, but I am just too tired with all the teaching and school managing I did this year. I deserve this break to give me time to re-energize and reflect on things that matter most to me. I will definitely go frolic in the beach, maybe bring with me my pet dogs. I have two – a Doberman and a Shitzu. I have three speaking engagements lined up too – two have been confirmed. It will be work and play therefore, so I hope my summer vacation come April and May is what all I expect it to be: fun, relaxing and rewarding!