When Boys Simply are Boys
In a BBC news report yesterday, I was not at all surprised of the percentage of school children behaving badly, 54%. The report continued that there was also increased incidences of violence against teachers by both the parents and the students. I don't have to look very far. In our school too there is a significant number of student behaving badly enough to cause us teachers more problems. There is no single factor that can explain this behavior changes. It could be genetic, parental, social, economic, instructional - almost everything that touches children's lives has been considered a culprit. I can attest to the veracity of this assumption. When I went to school today, along the way and in school I met three students that proved this assumption correct.
This school year, our sophomore students have been a problem. Two sections have new teacher-advisers and these are the groups that have been causing me a lot of trouble. I even hurt myself in one occasion of class confrontation. The three students I met belonged to these classes. I have observed after 10 years in school that new teachers were always tested by students. They would not only like to know how good you are in instruction and class management. They would also like to test how patient you are. In my case, they got me figured out all wrongly. They tested me on how violently angry I could be. Because I would like to believe that the new teachers we have hired are competent enough in instruction, I have an inkling now that both teachers may have been so lenient with class management, and that both their patience have been tested to their wits' end.
It has long been studied and proven true that children growing in a dysfunctional family tend to have behavior problems later on in their lives. Children living away from both their parents live in a dysfunctional family. The first student I met today lives with his grandmother. He was transferred from the city to the province because of financial reasons. Both parents would like to save significant amounts of what they earned monthly. Deceptively, the child does not seem to have any behavior problem. He is more emotionally disturbed which he translates into age inappropriate actions and projects them to his classmates. He annoyingly commits minor infractions that have sexual connotations - sending nude pictures to classmates' phones and cracking innocent jokes with sex undertones. To a 14 year old pubertal boy, this could be the start of sexual deviancy, not to mention that he could physically hurt his classmates whenever he was angered - Hulk style.
The second boy I met also shares the same background as the Hulk - lives only with a mother. We do not have a clear reason of why he is relocated from the city to the province, and also where his father is. We just do not have the nerve to ask the boy where his father is thinking it might be offensive and intrusive on his self. This boy cannot just handle questions of this nature. His being a social outcast bordering in deviancy is his greatest problem. He may also have attention problems. He talks back to teachers, irritating them. He loves reprimands and welcomes them nonchalantly. He appreciates if the whole class suffers because of his misbehavior. He is always absent without valid reasons, and comes to school late everyday for 173 days. In as much as the school wants to help him, unfortunately we cannot get the mother to cooperate with us.
While I was signing papers, our school registrar got inside the office and told me that a mother was waiting outside. She wanted to talk to me about the third boy I met today. I want to understand this poor guy; however, he just rubs my elbow the opposite way. This repeater is every teacher's ultimate nightmare. With my height and built, I can very well bully students if I want, both being in authority and because of my size. Never have any students talked back to me disrespectfully not until this boy, who unfortunately has been well-provided by the mother. Again, his father is away, working abroad - another member of a dysfunctional family. He does not come back in the afternoon. He does not bring books, papers and notebooks, not even a pen to school. He talks back to me which irritates me so much. Not that I demand respect, but I think I deserve one. I gave his mother today a permit for him to take summer classes for subjects he failed last year and this year. He failed in one last year. He failed in two this year. We will not accept him back next year.
It cannot be denied that behavior problems may be school related. They may even be teacher-induced. Discounting the fact that these three students may have misbehaved because of the school and their respective teachers, the one common factor all three shared is being a part (or actually non-part) of a dysfunctional family. The family forms the first immediate environment of the child. Because behavior is predominantly influenced by the surrounding of the child, whenever, therefore, a family does not serve its nurturing, supporting and caring functions to all its members, then a misbehaved child is in order. However organized societal structures like to modify this child's behavior, he sees the world dichotomously because his very own small world, his family, does not seem to conform with what societal norms, mores and culture expect from him.
Before, teaching has been so fulfilling for me. Today, it does not hold any wonder for me at all. Our sole purpose as an educational institution is concretely etched in our vision and mission as a school. I measure my accomplishment as a teacher whenever I can bring my students closer to the vision the school and the community have for them. This school year was very frustrating. I would like to believe that we have done our best, our all, to convey this students closer to what we want them to be; however, we failed dismally. Minor infractions and misbehavior haunt us. Again this could be school in origin, but this could also have parental, societal and even economic reasons. Because the school is just another part of a student's total self, definitely, the solution to this misbehavior among students is not of the school alone. It is of the parents and of society too, but please, let us not blame economic recession.
In a BBC news report yesterday, I was not at all surprised of the percentage of school children behaving badly, 54%. The report continued that there was also increased incidences of violence against teachers by both the parents and the students. I don't have to look very far. In our school too there is a significant number of student behaving badly enough to cause us teachers more problems. There is no single factor that can explain this behavior changes. It could be genetic, parental, social, economic, instructional - almost everything that touches children's lives has been considered a culprit. I can attest to the veracity of this assumption. When I went to school today, along the way and in school I met three students that proved this assumption correct.
This school year, our sophomore students have been a problem. Two sections have new teacher-advisers and these are the groups that have been causing me a lot of trouble. I even hurt myself in one occasion of class confrontation. The three students I met belonged to these classes. I have observed after 10 years in school that new teachers were always tested by students. They would not only like to know how good you are in instruction and class management. They would also like to test how patient you are. In my case, they got me figured out all wrongly. They tested me on how violently angry I could be. Because I would like to believe that the new teachers we have hired are competent enough in instruction, I have an inkling now that both teachers may have been so lenient with class management, and that both their patience have been tested to their wits' end.It has long been studied and proven true that children growing in a dysfunctional family tend to have behavior problems later on in their lives. Children living away from both their parents live in a dysfunctional family. The first student I met today lives with his grandmother. He was transferred from the city to the province because of financial reasons. Both parents would like to save significant amounts of what they earned monthly. Deceptively, the child does not seem to have any behavior problem. He is more emotionally disturbed which he translates into age inappropriate actions and projects them to his classmates. He annoyingly commits minor infractions that have sexual connotations - sending nude pictures to classmates' phones and cracking innocent jokes with sex undertones. To a 14 year old pubertal boy, this could be the start of sexual deviancy, not to mention that he could physically hurt his classmates whenever he was angered - Hulk style.
The second boy I met also shares the same background as the Hulk - lives only with a mother. We do not have a clear reason of why he is relocated from the city to the province, and also where his father is. We just do not have the nerve to ask the boy where his father is thinking it might be offensive and intrusive on his self. This boy cannot just handle questions of this nature. His being a social outcast bordering in deviancy is his greatest problem. He may also have attention problems. He talks back to teachers, irritating them. He loves reprimands and welcomes them nonchalantly. He appreciates if the whole class suffers because of his misbehavior. He is always absent without valid reasons, and comes to school late everyday for 173 days. In as much as the school wants to help him, unfortunately we cannot get the mother to cooperate with us.While I was signing papers, our school registrar got inside the office and told me that a mother was waiting outside. She wanted to talk to me about the third boy I met today. I want to understand this poor guy; however, he just rubs my elbow the opposite way. This repeater is every teacher's ultimate nightmare. With my height and built, I can very well bully students if I want, both being in authority and because of my size. Never have any students talked back to me disrespectfully not until this boy, who unfortunately has been well-provided by the mother. Again, his father is away, working abroad - another member of a dysfunctional family. He does not come back in the afternoon. He does not bring books, papers and notebooks, not even a pen to school. He talks back to me which irritates me so much. Not that I demand respect, but I think I deserve one. I gave his mother today a permit for him to take summer classes for subjects he failed last year and this year. He failed in one last year. He failed in two this year. We will not accept him back next year.
It cannot be denied that behavior problems may be school related. They may even be teacher-induced. Discounting the fact that these three students may have misbehaved because of the school and their respective teachers, the one common factor all three shared is being a part (or actually non-part) of a dysfunctional family. The family forms the first immediate environment of the child. Because behavior is predominantly influenced by the surrounding of the child, whenever, therefore, a family does not serve its nurturing, supporting and caring functions to all its members, then a misbehaved child is in order. However organized societal structures like to modify this child's behavior, he sees the world dichotomously because his very own small world, his family, does not seem to conform with what societal norms, mores and culture expect from him.Before, teaching has been so fulfilling for me. Today, it does not hold any wonder for me at all. Our sole purpose as an educational institution is concretely etched in our vision and mission as a school. I measure my accomplishment as a teacher whenever I can bring my students closer to the vision the school and the community have for them. This school year was very frustrating. I would like to believe that we have done our best, our all, to convey this students closer to what we want them to be; however, we failed dismally. Minor infractions and misbehavior haunt us. Again this could be school in origin, but this could also have parental, societal and even economic reasons. Because the school is just another part of a student's total self, definitely, the solution to this misbehavior among students is not of the school alone. It is of the parents and of society too, but please, let us not blame economic recession.
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