Wednesday, March 11, 2009

TRIPLE X - TXE BIG, TXE BOLD & TXE BEAUTIFUL

Prey on Me, Pray my Soul, Free my Spirit

I was not in school today. We did not have regular classes. Only the second year students were in school. We had the Year 2 National Achievement Test, and I was the chief examiner in one of the private schools three towns down south; thus, my day started earlier because the school was a 45-minute travel from my place. The weather was not so good. There was a heavy rain last night so the road was quite slippery. Driving was a bit difficult. The conduct of the test went smoothly. I finished at around quarter past two in the afternoon.

I was able to talk with one of the administrators in the school I was testing. She was my friend. I told her I have resigned but I added that the regional superintendent did not approve of my resignation. I though asked for a compromise, I went on, but still today I am bent on resigning. The reason my resignation was denied, she told me, was that I am still very much needed in the school. Indulge me because this is big. Feed my ego and nourish my animal desires for recognition. She just did that and it made me happy. I knew long before that I was and still today a big egomaniac id tripper.

Mine was a bold move though. I have always wanted to drop the bomb-resign-but I was not able to muster all the courage. I have so much respect of my immediate superiors that telling them I would resign, to me was a disrespect. Feed this ego tripping maniac. I felt so elated hearing what I have long waited to hear: that I was needed, I was wanted, I was revered, I was worshipped! What bold but foolish thoughts they have been. It got into my mind. It got into my system that going home I decided to celebrate. Feed my ego, nourish my animal instinct to reign supreme above all others. Triple B not X was my destination. I wanted to conquer the world. I have conquered the world...boldly, foolishly.

Up there in Bodo's is a beautiful xeriscape. Up there is the ultimate high for ego trippers. I enjoyed the sight so much. It was purely hedonistic hypnosis I don't want to wake up anymore. Feed my ego, nourish me, one big, boldly foolish egomaniac. Satisfied was my basest phallic instinct to selfish pleasure. I felt like the king of the world. My head ached but still I was the king of the world. I am the king of the world - one foolish, choleric id tripper. I am all ready to die now. I have pleasured myself, even death could not cheat. Die, you cheater. Feed my ego, starve my soul. Nourish the animal in me, prey on my spirit. Die, you egomaniac.

I am not big nor am I bold but life is beautiful. Life can still be beautiful. Starve me, feed my soul. Prey on me, free my spirit, pray for my soul - one egomaniac sad soul.

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